More Deeply Human

By Divinity on Nov 5, 2008 in Diaries

Dear beautiful, primal, magical creature. I wish that you could see what I see when I look at you. You astonish me. I can’t promise to know what you should do or to be here forever. I can promise that I love and believe in you. Thank you for lighting me up.

I’ve caught myself on many occasions breaking the rule of “being”: worrying about what I should be, striving to become something better, instead of just being who I am. I feel like I am arriving back into myself after several years of intense spiritual journey by being honest about who I am and what I want as an individual rather than thinking about what I should be, what others want from me, or trying to be MORE. Looking into a dear mirror friend of mine and seeing his shining beauty despite what he calls his “mess” allowed me to realize that my mess is probably not as bad as I think either. I am in the process of kicking the demon in the butt that says “not good enough”.

Can we stay positive and keep our faith when there is so much chaos surrounding us? Can we trust that it is all leading us closer to ourselves? The first step to accepting ourselves is to own up to what’s ours. We have to stop putting blame and focus on others and be willing to accept that certain ‘problems’, etc are of our own making. I am so grateful to have come across the information imprinted upon me so I can release it and no longer be bound or tormented by it.

If we’re all just information flowing in and out, then anything and everything can and will change. So, what can be made in the moment? What joy can you find there? Are you okay with yourself? Can you accept yourself? Can you stay at a point of observation, aware of the lessons presented in each moment? Can you deal with you? Can you embrace you?

I’ve learned that the journey to ascension is not to leave behind what we are. It is to know ourselves inside and out and to be FULLY what we are. You have to let go of the traumas of your past life before you can begin a new one. Then a realization hits: You know what? I GET to be ME! No one else gets to do that. No one else gets to explore what it’s like to be ME or to create what I want to create. The whole purpose for me being here is to BE ME….to FEEL what it is like.

As my love flows forth into the world around me and returns blessings upon me, I once again open up to trying new things, working with and accepting all about myself without judgment - I am free.

This week, I made a list of things I love to help honestly remind me of myself. Why don’t you do the same? Measure yourself by your loves.

I love Cody, feeling pretty, being in nature, dancing, singing, laughing, babies, hugs, being wild, being barefoot, rolling around, being ‘right’, learning new things, creatures, exploration and discovery, boobies, “be-ing”, colors, music, exercise, being mischievous, providing and caring, cuddling, the beach, the forest, being fit and healthy, being in love, accomplishment, friends, worship, playing dress up, photo shoots, storytelling, being brilliant, shining my light, helping others, acting in love, knowing me, family, being content, daydreaming, nightwalking, confessing, undressing, bizarre chaos, divine order, the unknown, the forgotten, the ancient, the new, wisdom, flying, swimming, doing, seeing, knowing I am what I am and that’s good enough.

Will you be a random collection of items or a beautifully arranged collection of loves? I am deeply touched by this quote. Adlai E. Stevenson: “The spiritual man tries less to be godly than to be deeply human.” In a journey of learning to be more godlike, how can we be more deeply human?

More Deeply Human

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More Deeply Human

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